


Messenger

by bushViperCutie



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Diagon Alley, Funny, Gen, Hogwarts, Humor, One Shot, POV Severus Snape, Short One Shot, Snape Appreciation Month 2020
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-27
Updated: 2020-06-27
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:14:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,056
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24940648
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bushViperCutie/pseuds/bushViperCutie
Summary: Severus is tired of Minerva making him run around the castle delivering his messages and makes him get an animal that can do it for him.
Relationships: Minerva McGonagall & Severus Snape
Kudos: 51





	Messenger

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: For Snape Appreciation Month, prompt 17: Snape’s Pets.

#  **~~~ * ~~~ * ~~~ * ~~~ * ~~~**

Severus knocked on the door to Minerva’s office and slid a paper under the door. He headed back down the dungeon stairs and entered his office, leaving the door ajar and sat down at his desk. He closed his eyes for a second and leaned back, hoping to catch a break. He heard fluttering and he opened them, watching as Minerva’s owl swooped inside and landed on his desk. The owl stuck out it’s foot and almost bit him as he removed the letter.

_‘Please elaborate more, although I like the sound of it. I’m not sure Albus will be too keen unless you have a full plan. I suggest you write it up before we go talk to him._

_-Minerva’_

Severus sighed, scrawling his answer and rolling it up again. He stood with a groan and made his way all the way back to Minerva’s office door, knocked hard three times, and slid the paper under it. He grumbled and waited a few seconds knowing if he walked down now, he would be marching back up in a few minutes.

The door opened and Minerva poked her head out, chuckling, and flung her owl out into the corridor. She turned her head and yelped, finally spotting Severus standing on the other side of the door.

“Merlin! Severus… Make some noise next time,” she fixed her hat and walked back into her office.

He followed and crossed his arms in front of her desk, “You’ve been doing this on purpose!”

She looked at him with a tight-lipped smile, “I just don’t understand why you don’t get yourself an owl.”

“Why, so that it’s one more thing I have to clean in my office?” He frowned at her chuckle, “I do clean. Believe it or not.”

“Not.” She poured tea and motioned for him to sit, “Then you can’t be getting upset that you have to be running back and forth to talk to your coworkers.”

He crossed his legs and turned away, “I’m not.”

Minerva raised a brow and took out her glasses, placed them on the edge of her nose and looked down at the paper on her desk. “‘Oh really? I thought I could wing it. Thanks for the advice, you know me best, Severus Never-Prepared Snape. Let me just write out the full documentation of my plan word for word so you can go through it for laughs and then I’ll go ahead and waste my time doing the exact same for Dumbledore. Just for clarity, would you like me to write it out in English or Feline?’” She put her glasses away and sipped her tea.

He clicked his tongue, “Well I don’t want an owl – Or a cat.”

She rolled her eyes at him, “Go down to Diagon Alley this weekend and get one. Just see what animals they have.”

…

Severus coughed, trying to get all the dust and soot out of his lungs as he stepped out of the fireplace and into a small shop on Diagon Alley. He walked out onto the cobble street and made his way north towards ‘Magical Menagerie’ like Minerva had said.

The shop was small and tucked away behind a bend on the street. It was hardly noticeable except for all the noise coming from the open door and window. Severus stepped in and could immediately smell every animal that was for sale. The squawking and hissing and squeaking and rattling all got louder the second he walked towards the rows of cages, as if alerting the owner of his presence.

He couldn’t help but sneer at all the cats, rats, ravens, nifflers, kneazles, and bats on display. None of them looked like they suited him at all and he feared leaving any of them in his office or classroom. He shook his head and walked back towards the door, when he noticed a pen he hadn’t seen before.

Dozens of ferrets wriggled and writhed over each other for crinkly balls and toy blocks. Severus bent down and poked at them, feeling them lick and hold onto his finger, begging for attention. He wrinkled his nose at them and look over at the far corner to a larger looking ferret eyeing him intently.

“You won’t like that one,” came the voice of the woman at the counter. “He’s too judge-y.”

He stood up and wiped his fingers on his coat, “‘Judge-y’? What is it? A Jarvey?”

“Part Jarvey. Can’t string together more than a few words but he sure can pick-em.”

He looked back at the large ferret and looked into its steely eyes, “How old is he?”

She shrugged, “Old. Been here a long time. He puts people off… People buy him and then give him back next day.”

“I’ll take him.”

“No money back if you do.”

“I’ll take him.”

…

Severus carried the cage into his office and placed it on his desk. “You better not disappoint,” he opened the cage door and watched as the overgrown ferret exited and sat, licking its whiskers and paws. He sat down at his desk and after a minute poked its belly, “Is this all you do?”

The ferret turned to him, “big nose,” it squeaked.

He leaned forward, growling, “At least I don’t look like a noodle.”

The ferret frowned back, “Oily slug! Large beak!”

It scampered around his desk and curled up on some papers, watching him. Severus wrote out a quick note to Minerva and handed it to him.

“Do your job and take this to Minerva McGonagall,” he shoved the rolled paper into the ferret’s tiny paws. “And compliment her hat for me.”

It gripped the paper and jump onto the floor, ran to the door and before it exited it yelled out, “Bossy bird.”

Severus leaned back and closed his eyes, waiting for his ferret to return. Within minutes his door slammed open and Minerva walked in, clutching his ferret around its wiggly body. She stormed over and held him out.

“You will take him back, Severus. Tomorrow.”

He scoffed, “This furry noodle is my new son.” He took the ferret and held it in his lap, scratching behind its ear.

“Well, then I should hate for one of the owls to find him,” she huffed and stormed away, slamming the door shut.

“Scary cat.”

The ferret nodded in agreement.

#  **~~~ * ~~~ * ~~~ * ~~~ * ~~~**


End file.
